I laughed so hard, I cried.

Serriously, though, I'm writing book reviews like a fiend!!

Sam Cruz’s Infallible Guide to Getting Girls

Author: Tallulah Darling

Genre:YA

Content Rating: R for “strong language, drinking, euphemisms, and lots of "’bow chicka wow wow’”

Coffee Beans: 4.5

Favorite Line: Holy crap, there were so many.

Personal Recommendation: Read it. Now

Cover Appeal: So awesome it’s beyond words

Instalove Factor: None

Spoliers: No

Publisher’s Summary:

Why the hell can't chicks be more like guys?

That question plagues high school senior Sam Cruz. Sam is perfectly happy being a player. He just wishes girls wouldn't change the game from sex to relationships. It makes him look like an asshole. But when Sam's best friend, Ally Klinger, gets dumped, she begs him to transform her into someone who can screw around then screw off. No risk of heartbreak that way. It's Sam's chance to create the perfect female AND cheer up his best friend. Armed with Sam's Three Step Guide to Backseat Success, Ally gets the game better than Sam thought she would and before long, Sam has his wish: the female version of himself. Too bad it's driving him nuts. Told from Sam's and Ally's alternating POVs, Sam Cruz's Infallible Guide to Getting Girls is a fast-paced romantic comedy that follows these teens as they navigate the minefield of sex, love, and friendship.

This book contains strong language, drinking, euphemisms, and lots of "bow chicka wow wow."

My Review:

Holy hell. Was this book funny! I’m not talking, “Yeah, I cracked a smile a few times” funny, but “I laughed out loud and got strange looks from strangers” funny. Like, on every page.  I loved the hilarious banter between Ally and Sam. Their one liners and inside jokes. The scenes and situations that Tallulah wrote I could picture in my head at every second, which made the hilarity of what was going on even more real. I mean, this should be a movie. Granted, it probably wouldn’t be appropriate for the kiddos out there because of all the bow chicka wow wow.

So, here’s my warning to you about this book if you’re thinking about reading it: If you go into this with the mindset that this is supposed to be some serious, profound book, you’re going to be disappointed. Possibly even disgusted. But, if you go into this book with the mindset of “it is what it is”, you’ll appreciate what Ally’s trying to do and Sam’s struggle with turning his best friend into himself. That’s how I was able to enjoy this book as much as I did and read it in less than a day.

The book, obviously, is about sex. And while that’s a vulgar topic for a YA book to be about, Tallulah does it in a way that somehow, is completely un-vulgar. She has mad skill in the dialogue department and the setup of the relationship between Ally and Sam right from the beginning. I think it’s because alternating chapters are told from either Sam or Ally’s POV.

Which coincidentally was also a problem I had with this book.

There were several times I thought I was reading Ally’s POV only to remember it was Sam’s head I was in. Talk about confusing. The only other thing I had an issue with, was when a certain secret was spilled, suddenly everyone knew, but I don't remember ever reading a scene where the friends were told about said secret. It just all of a sudden, was.

I especially enjoyed the relationship development between Ally and Sam. Given their history and backgrounds, the pace in which the evolution happened was totally believable. Especially the end. Which I won’t spoil for you. But I'll for sure be on the prowl for more of Tallulah's books. 

Some funny lines:

“Yo, fry Ninja, step down.” --Ally

“Monkey humping credit card baller,” I mutter. “I don’t think so.” --Sam

“Having just gushed like chicks in a tampon commercial, I feel I need to get this speech back on a more manly track. ‘So deal with it.’ There. Balls back.” --Sam

I want you to go and read it for yourself, laugh until your sides hurt and you get cautious looks from strangers, and then pass the book on to a friend.  

Now.

Like, seriously.

AND the book trailer is pretty kick ass. :) 

Happy reading, my friends!

--Me